Thanks For The Memories

Well, finally, it’s done. What an amazing series! A dozen posts from some truly impressive guest bloggers to close out 2010.

I must confess, back when I started this little “experiment”, I never thought it would last this long or lead to so many great things. I just knew I needed some time to FINALLY finish an e-book I’d been working on for over a year, and to get some head space to think about what to do next.

Someone once told me: “If you have a blog [and you write regularly], you will think about it every single day that you have it”, and boy were they right. For the most part, that has been a good thing, as over the past year I have been able to refine what I think self-leadership is, what it looks like and how it works, and most importantly, how to get better at living it out. But sometimes it has felt like all I can do in a given week to write 1000 words about it. Just like any commitment, the discipline of blogging is not always an easy one to keep.

This break has been constructive in reminding me of why I started blogging in the first place. I wanted a way to connect with you, my friends B.B. (Before Blogging) as well as all those I have met and communicated with since beginning to blog. And I seriously could Nev. Er. have imagined the awesomeness that is you people, my favorite readers. Thank you for all of your comments and e-mails and tweets and facebook messages and posts……they are like an invisible army of good feelings and power and purpose that walk with me on this journey. I’ve missed our chats.

I’ll have plenty to say in the weeks to come about some new ideas and directions for TMP. And yet, it feels weird to just be moving on without some acknowledgement of the magnitude of work that each of our guests have done. I feel like these people came and visited my house while I was gone, and they cleaned it and fixed it up and decorated it and made it WAY BETTER than it was before, and then I come back and there is just no way I can act like the place is exactly the same.

So, Lesley, Amanda, Jeff, Anna, Pema, Erica, Lori, Adam, Siouxzie, Roy, Katz, and Sarah, THANK YOU.

Thank you for challenging us, for giving us things to think about, to laugh about, to wince about, to pray about. All I asked you to do was write 800-1000 words on a time in your life when you exercised self-leadership, and each and every one of you hit it absolutely out of the park.

Through your generous and candid writing, each of you has demonstrated some of the most essential elements of self-leadership. I don’t want to forget or overlook these, as TMP continues to build and grow. These key elements are like touchstones of what TMP is really all about, in helping people lead themselves where they want to go.

As I enter the new year and get ready for all that 2011 brings, I’m taking with me at least 5 things that my guest posters have shown me.

Item # 1: Depth. A client said one of my all-time favorite quotes to me a few weeks ago. She said: “I want to keep getting narrower and deeper, not wider and weaker.” So. Good. And these guest posters went deep, every time. Thank you, Roy, for the reminder that we need the poor more than we think. And thank you Adam and Lori and Sarah, for not letting me get away with living a superficial life. I need that encouragement to focus, to not apologize that I can’t be all things to all people all the time, that boundaries and limits are not just good but necessary, if we are to do what we are meant to do as well as it is possible to do it.

Item #2: Community. I dug how Lesley drew others in with her classic narrative of “one woman’s struggle.” The comments on her piece were evidence of the nerve that she hit by referencing the community of women who are married and/or mothers. Even Anna’s yoga class was not only acknowledged but venerated as a valuable instrument. You guys know how much I like to beat the drum of “known and not alone”, and it honestly gives me goose-bumps to think about how we all lived this out by hearing and respecting one another’s stories.

Item #3: Humor. Y’all cracked me up! And not only are you able to see and comment on what is funny about life and situations, but you are able to direct your humor at yourself, and get us to smirk at your split-into-committees-brain with you (Amanda), your precious distractions/essentials of life (Jeff), and at your mantra, which is my personal motto for 2011: “Scramble or die” (Pema). I’m so grateful that none of you take yourselves too seriously, but that you definitely took your message seriously and weren’t afraid to sacrifice your ego for the sake of it. Comedy is immensely healing as well as freeing, and TMP is about those things as well. Way to bring the funny.

Item #4: Honesty. Everyone I asked to do a guest post said yes. Initially. Then, a few just couldn’t get theirs done, for whatever reason. But rather than limit the numbers, that phenomenon opened me up to lots of other possibilities of people and writing that I would not have considered before. Originally, this whole guest-blog enterprise was supposed to be short; like 4 weeks.  But it literally tripled in size because people kept coming to mind that I thought would have great things to share. I’m so glad we expanded the tribe. Some of those later additions were some of the most open and straightforward pieces of writing that I’ve ever seen, on any blog. The willingness of this group to take risks and to own their individual narratives was incredibly significant. It’s not always easy to write about heartbreak or identity or growth or loss or conflict, but you all did it with grace and ease.

Item #5: Courage. True self-leadership begins and ends with having the guts to stand up and name what is shaping your soul. While we may not all be going through such severe crises at the moment, you can be sure I will remember Erica’s words the next time I grieve, or a friend grieves. (In fact, I already recommended her post to someone who recently lost a dear friend.) When I feel frustrated that I can’t make someone I love do what I want, Emily’s wise words will echo in my head. Times I’m tempted to doubt whether my choices to save my family further pain are not a bit too extreme, I will think of Souxzie. And I will take courage. The word courage comes from the French word “Couer”, meaning heart. May all of our hearts be made strong in 2011.

I honestly cannot imagine anyone who could have demonstrated these 5 elements better than these twelve guest bloggers. What a gift. Thanks for taking the risk and for leading yourself to guest post. You inspire me!

Come back next week for more on the coming changes to TMP. Until then, keep kicking 2011 in the face.

Lead Your Life.