On a walk this past week, clearing my head from all the eating and shopping and talking and football-game watching, one of my favorite hymns came on my shuffle. My favorite line says:
If you tarry ‘till you’re better / You may never come at all
The point is that putting off something phenomenal and life-changing until you are “better” is ridiculous and crazy, especially when that something will in itself change your life. I totally resonate with the desire to improve, of course, especially at this time of the year, and I have often rationalized over-preparing myself for something by saying I’m not ready. Not ready for total freedom, when I crave control. Not ready for bliss, when I want certitude. Not ready for a journey when what I’m interested in is the destination.
Hi, I’m Michele, and I used to have practice conversations with my dates in the mirror before they picked me up.
I love the fact that I can always make a different choice. Five minutes from now, I can take a different route to get to the movie theatre and by doing that, I am opening myself up to a degree of risk that I wouldn’t have otherwise.
Or am I?
How do I know the familiar route to the movie theatre is less risky? Because I know the way, so I am more likely to proceed successfully? If that were true, people would never fall in the bathroom. (Think about it.)
I can always, always, ALWAYS choose to take a step forward, rather than backward. It may not feel that way- it may feel like if I take another step forward I will surely burst into flames, but the truth is that the choice is up to me.*
That is the classic definition of self-leadership.
From going to the movie theatre to becoming the person you are created to be, if you wait until you’re more developed or enhanced to begin, you may never arrive at your ultimate destination at all.
For me, the need to delay comes from focusing more on the immediate than the future. When I think about what it takes for me to stop the four things I’m doing simultaneously, get ready and leave the house to go to the movie, I linger and delay. I cling to the comfort and security of known surroundings.
But when I imagine the experience of the movie; the great story, the popcorn, companionship and laughing with friends, I can hardly wait. I decide I don’t actually need to change my clothes and I head for the door.
What is it for you? Moving to a new place? Applying to a new job or graduate school? Starting a new relationship or business? Having a long overdue conversation or making a decision you have been avoiding? Confessing? Joining? Asking? Committing?
As we enter 2012, remember this reality: You can choose your own path. Delaying action until you are a superior or more advanced version of yourself may in fact determine your doom.
Don’t put it off any longer. Step forward into the future that you are creating, this very minute. Embrace responsibility for your one wild and precious life. Don’t let the fear stop you. Our imagination is only limited by our experience; get some more experience and watch the fear wither. Do what it takes. I believe in you.
Do. Not. Tarry.
Make no mistake, self-leadership is hard. But it’s worth it.
Definitely better than any movie you could ever see.
*Sometimes what looks like a step forward will in fact be a step backwards, and vice versa. But that’s another post.